Issue #210: How to Keep Love Alive in a Relationship (And When to Leave It)

Staying in love after the fall.

📚 Discontent by Beatriz Serrano: In this translation from the Spanish bestseller (out today!), thirty-something Marisa hates her job as a creative executive at an ad agency—even though she told a fair number of lies to get there. When her company forces her to go on a retreat in central Spain, she finds herself surrounded by the exact coworkers she hates and succumbing to a spiral.

🎥 ‘Griffin in Summer,’ in theaters: This sweet coming-of-age story, in theaters now, follows 14-year-old Griffin, a young playwright who takes his craft very seriously. When his mother hires a struggling actor to help out around the house, Griffin experiences new, intense desires. Also out recently: ‘The Roses’ stars Olivia Coleman but I’ve heard not-great reviews, ‘Splitsville’ and ‘Caught Stealing,’ the latest from Darren Aronofsky, and ‘Thursday Murder Club’ on Netflix.

💿 ‘Hard Headed Woman’ by Margo Price: Price’s ‘Strays’ was one of my favorite albums of 2023, and while her latest release is decidedly less rock and more honky-tonk, I am fully on board. It references The Handmaid’s Tale, Elvis Presley, and psychedelics all with great beats. I’m also enjoying ‘Dreamsicle’ by Maren Morris!

It’s still impossible for me to write about the end of my marriage with any distance. Plumbing it for meaning and understanding means peering down into the well of grief I worked so hard to crawl out of. There were several times in writing this post that I had to stop and allow myself to acclimate to the depth, allowing the pain to stabilize, before descending further. I’ve tortured myself endlessly in the past three years since my separation, mulling over what I could have done differently, despite the fact that there’s no going back. At the same time, it feels necessary to look back so that I can learn from my own experience and, hopefully, never make the same mistakes again.

This issue of Morning Person is the result of years of personal research into the question, How can I keep a big, life-altering love from stagnating? (Is it even possible?) It includes personal stories, theories, and practices I’ve applied to my current relationship, to create a love that lasts. I’m keeping it entirely behind a paywall because of how intimate this topic feels to me. I hope you find it helpful. xx